Before marriage:
Roses are red, sky is blue,
O my darling! I love you…
After Marriage:
Roses are dead,
I have flu,
don’t come near me,
Paray hatt tuu,
Wife to husband:- kaap aap sms hotay
Wife:
Jaanu kash aap SMS hotay,
Main aap ko save karti,
Husband:
Jaan-e-man, kaash tum ring tone hoti,
Main her haftay tumhe change karta 
Pathan darwaza open ker k washroom jata
Aik pathan jub bhi wash room
jata to darwaza khol kar jata.
Kisi ne wajah pochi to us ne bataya
k usey shak hai k darwaze k neecay
wale soorah se use koi dekhta hai
Monkeys play football
Sardar to doctor:
When I sleep, monkeys
play football in my dreams.
Dr:No problem,
just take this medicine b4 sleep.
Sardar: Kal se khaonga aaj final hai.
if your father earned $100,000
Teacher: Johny,
if your father earned $100,000
and gave half of it to your mother,
what would she have?
Little johny: A heart a attack!
Mujhe sardar bana do
Admi:Mujhe sardar bana do
Doc: uske liye tumhara 50% dimagh nikalna parega
Admi: OK
Doctor ne ghalti se 90% nikal dia.
Admi hosh mein aa k bola: Khocha ye tumne kia kar dia.
Meri zindagi per faqat itna ehsan ker do
Meri zindagi per faqat itna ehsan ker do,
Ik benam si mohabbat mere naam kerdo,
Ik subha ko milo aur shaam kerdo,
Aur sham tak mere ghar ka sara kam kerdo,
Har bar hamara dil dukhatay ho
Kion har bar mosam ki tarah badal jate ho,
Har bar hamara dil dukhatay ho,
Yeh bat sun ker hamari roh tak kanp gaye,
Ae dost tum masjidon se chapal or lote churate ho
When do you want to start?
Boss:I will give you Rs.25 an hour starting today
and in 3 months, I will raise it to Rs.50 an hour.
When do you want to start?
New employee:In 3 months.
Devil challenged in a game of cricket
The devils challenged
the angels to a game of cricket.
We have got all the cricketers, said the Angels.
Devils:No problem,
we have got all the umpires.