Best funny sms text messages and jokes collection

Forget all about it !!

An elderly husband and wife visit their doctor

when they begin forgetting little things.

Their doctor tells them that many people

find it useful to write themselves little notes.

When they get home, the wife says,

“Dear, will you please go to the kitchen

and get me a dish of ice cream?

And maybe write that down so you won’t forget?”

“Nonsense,” says the husband,

“I can remember a dish of ice cream.”

“Well,” says the wife, “I’d also like some

strawberries and whipped cream on it.”

“My memory’s not all that bad,

” says the husband. “No problem — a dish of ice cream

with strawberries and whipped cream.

I don’t need to write it down.”

He goes into the kitchen;

his wife hears pots and pans banging around.

The husband finally emerges from the kitchen

and presents his wife with a plate of bacon and eggs.

She looks at the plate and asks,

“Hey, where’s the toast I asked for?”

Killer joke.., Funny SMS

Killer joke..

A lady walking on road,
Chatting on whatsapp,
with her left b**b open..

Policeman- ye kya hai..??
Lady- O shitt, munna to bus me hi reh gaya..!!

Accident Mein Aadmi Ka, Funny SMS

Accident Mein Aadmi Ka Cut Gaya:

Doctor: Hamare Pas Kutte ka Hai, laga dain?

Wife Sharma K Boli: Gadhey Ka Laga do, Kuttey Jesa To inka Pehle bhi Tha.

Hindi ya English mein, Funny SMS

Student: Sir, log Hindi ya English mein baat karte hai,
Maths mein kyun nahi?

Sir: Zyada 3 5 na kar,
9,2,11 ho ja.
Warna 5 7 maar dunga.
6 kw 36 Nazar ayenge aur 32 k 32 bahar aa jayenge.

Student: Sirji Hindi, English hi theek hai
maths waqai khofnaak subject hai..!!

Geography Teacher, Funny SMS

Geography Teacher: Agar koi chota planet
prithvi se takraye toh kya hoga?

Student: to ‘Tadang’ jaisa aavaj aayega.
Sir gusse se: Kyu ??
Student: Ye Duniya, Ye Duniya Pittal di.

Once a girl asked a boy, Funny SMS

Once a girl asked a boy:
Why we have units to measure Weight, Height, Force, Speed, Distance etc.
But nothing to measure Love, Trust, Friendship. Why??

Boy thought for a while, took her in arms, looked in her deep eyes n said:
Dekho meri jaan !!
Deni hai to do….
Ye chutiya sawal pooch k dimaag ki maa na cho*o. 🙄

Pyar agar pant hai, Funny SMS

Pyar agar pant hai..
toh dosti chaddi hai..
pant agar phat
bhi jaye toh chaddi izzat bachati hai
Buddies you are my chaddies. 😀

A santa entered a ladies toilet, Funny SMS

A santa entered a ladies toilet..
Lady: Ye Mahilaon ke Liye Hai.

Santa Laughed, opened his zip:
Ye konsa garam masala kootne ke liye hai,
‘Ye bhi mahilaon ke liye hai..!!’

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